i had a dream last night that felt, upon waking, was a continuation of the dream from the other night. what i didn’t mention was that in that dream i thought about moving to another room in the dorm, but it was a much much smaller room and i would have to give up my private bathroom and large closet… in fact there wasn’t a closet in the smaller room at all, and there was barely room for a twin bed. the room i was in originally, and decided not to give up, had room for a queen sized bed and the closet was probably half the size of the bedroom.
when i was talking to my acupuncturist about the dream, she reminded me that house (including dorms) are representative of ourselves and our lives. by considering moving to the smaller room, and having the other girls tell me i should, was about feeling that they were trying to restrict who i am.
so last night i dreamed i was getting married. i have no idea who it was i was marrying, but i think he was fun and easy to be with and a good friend. anyhow, it was the day of the wedding and my bridesmaids were nowhere to be found. they just never showed up. there were two who showed up, i think one was hamster_grrl, and the rest just… nothing. no calls, nothing. they hadn’t backed out, they just weren’t there. they’d all bought dresses (which were bluish?) so they knew they were the bridesmaids and knew the day of the wedding. i was unhappy, but also had a feeling of something else. i’m not sure how to describe it. i wasn’t distraught. i guess it was a feeling of being very unimportant. of confirmation that they’d agreed for some other reason than because they really like me and who i am and want to support me.