last night i went to the fire arts festival at the crucible. several people asked me if i would be there, and i repeatedly said no. i had other plans friday and was heading out of town sunday so i needed to clean my house and pack.
then when i was shopping for some last minute business trip stuff, i noticed a voice mail from the person i was supposed to meet that night. he was having a hard time making it happen… the bay was too pretty and he would rather be sailing. plus, half an hour between our neighbourhoods was a significant distance. huh. well. that’s fine, i was more interested in the fire anyhow, but it again pointed out this strange sort of feeling of ‘otherness’ i have here in the bay area.
the psychological barrier of the bay is amazing to me. people do not like to cross bridges to see each other. then there’s the strange relationship with honesty. moments where i would choose to be vauge, others are frighteningly honest, and where i believe honesty is critical and necissary others are vauge or won’t discuss at all.
strange communications aside, i had a great time at the fire arts festival. again, i forgot my camera (something that’s been happening more and more lately). you’ll have to check out flickr for illustrations. i ran into my neighbours and a dude i used to work with. a couple times during the evening i was struck with how much fun and spectical we were having using fire when so much of the rest of the state is on fire in a dangerous, frightening way right now.
i’m reminded of how, as humans, our emotions can sometimes not be identified without external circumstances — how love and broken heartedness feel the same, how fear and attraction sometimes feel the same, too.
